Surrendering the Unknown

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.”

‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭3‬:‭5‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Growing up I experienced a lot of change in my life. Constant change I did not expect or see coming. It could have really been in any area of my life… relationships, school drama, family stuff, etc… but that change always sent me into fear, panic, and pain of not knowing what was going to come out of the situation or happen next. It got to the point where I was careful, due to fear, to avoid conflict or confrontation in the hopes that if I wasn’t near it or involved in it that it wouldn’t touch me. This avoidance of confrontation and conflict lead to a lot of problems… trust issues, people pleasing, a control problem, and even resulted in me constantly pushing my feelings down to avoid them. There were times I would be the driver in my friend group because I wanted to be able to “control” where we were going… that way I knew what was going to happen and when it would happen.

Let me just say, at that time in my life, I did not know Jesus. I had Jesus, just didn’t know He was right there with me the whole time. Unfortunately, things happen in life, both good things and bad things. Some are in our control and some are not.

Jesus says in John 15:5 “Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing.” I cannot express how true this is because how I was living was not doing me any good. My situations were not improving, I still had conflict and confrontation that bothered me, and it just felt like I was living in this constant cycle. What I was filling my days with to make me happy was a temporary fix, a moment of pleasure, not an eternal. I was living so far from Jesus. Once I decided to give Jesus a try, my life started to change. I started to surrender everything to God and give him control of my life. Little by little as I grew closer to the Lord, He started to take things away from me; control, fear, people pleasing, avoidance of feelings… he started to take everything away that had such a hold over my life and how I was living. He truly was healing me from the inside out.  But it all starts by going to Him in faith, with trust, and obedience to His word. We need to surrender to Him what’s not ours to carry.

We think we know in life what’s best for us in different situations and seasons we go through, but the truth is we don’t. We need to take our problems and situations to God because He is the one with all the answers. (Proverbs 3:5)

This isn’t a once and done thing though. Surrendering is an everyday thing. Each day comes with something new, some things we expect and some things we don’t. We have to trust and know that God’s got us and will help us throught everything that comes our way. If you really think about it… everyday is unknown. We don’t know if we will wake up tomorrow or what will happen. God only knows. we really don’t. We tend to think with emotions in our flesh, when in reality we should be going to God

Recently, we went through a miscarriage with our first baby. It was truly one of the most painful things we have ever experienced. I didn’t know what to think, do, or say. I was just so sad, angry, confused, broken. This was one of those something’s I didn’t see coming that life through in my path. Want to guess what I reverted too? Well at first, I felt all the pain that came the initial week it happened. I said things that I didn’t mean, I was crying non stop, I felt lonely, empty… safe to say I was feeling a lot of emotions. But then at one point… I started to shove it deep down and avoid what was evidently going on. I didn’t want to face my pain. I was avoiding my time with the Lord because I was so broken and my trust was waivering. I wanted to control how I felt but again they were only temporary fixes. Each day I felt nudges in my spirit to go pray, get in the word… and I knew I needed to but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. Some days I would pray but not get in the word, and other days I would avoid it all together. I was just so confused why all this was happening and didn’t understand. What I was doing was truly only hurting me more though.  I wasn’t allowing myself to fully allow Jesus to meet me where I was and heal me of my pain.

We know with Jesus, if we want to get over it, we got to go through it… and once I decided to allow Him to meet me where I was… He slowly started to heal my heart. It defintely took some time and effort but He met me where I needed Him too. After being persistent with prayer, in the word, and asking from prayer from those around me Jesus healed my heart and I started to feel joy again for the first time since early December. (this was only about a week ago too)

But this healing process involved me surrendering to the unknown, because I don’t know why our baby was taken from us so soon. I don’t know why a lot of things happen, and I may never know.    We really just don’t understand what any day will bring or why the things that happen happen or why we meet the people that we meet. But what I do know, is that God will find a purpose for it all… all the pain, joy, sorrow… He will use it somehow, someday, and someway. It’s just one of those things we have to find peace with God for.

“For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.”

‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭55‬:‭9‬ ‭NLT‬‬

All we need to do is surrender to His will, even though that means surrendering to the fact that we may not know what is going to happen today, tomorrow, or in the future. We have to let go, and let God do what He plans to do. It will all work together for His glory and at the end of the day that’s all we are here to do… to bring glory to Him.  The suffering we go through is only temporary, but the impact it can have on others is eternal. It could be a matter of their salvation.

So I asked you today, think about something you’re going through in life…

1. Have you surrendered it to God? Knowing that his plan is great than our plan.

2. Are you willing to get uncomfortable and surrender to the unknown of what today or tomorrow or the future will bring?